Doctor Who

• Penultimate episode title and synopsis revealed [spoilers + thanks to Stu_N]
• Christopher Eccleston joins Hilary Swank in Amelia

Film

• Amanda Peet to star in 2012
• Leonardo DiCaprio for Captain America?
• Punisher: War Zone trailer

Art

• U2 selling a Basquiat
• Picassos stolen in Brazil

Books

• Russell Brand signs $3m publishing deal

British TV

• Adrian Lester returning for fifth series of Hustle
• BBC1 to screen Peter Moffat's Criminal Justice over five nights
• Kelly Reilly to star in possible Lynda La Plante franchise for ITV1
• Rob Brydon launches his own indie [free registration required]
• Final episode of The Apprentice got more than 10 million viewers
• UKTV to launch new channel, rebrand old [free registration required]
• Justin Lee Collins to front Crystal Maze successor [free registration required]
• Into The Labyrinth coming to DVD

US TV

• Details of the The Office spin-off
• Jon Voight to be evil mastermind in 24
• Jean-Christophe Novelli getting a series on Bravo
• Jericho fans buy a TV ad
• Will McCormack and Eric Christian Olsen to recur on Brothers & Sisters

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I need your help.

I'm out tonight so won't be watching the final of The Apprentice live. Instead, I'll be recording it.

Given that I have to write the daily news for the blog tomorrow, can you think of any feasible way for me to avoid finding out who has won before I've had a chance to watch the episode?

Worse still, I'm out tomorrow night, so I've got to be able to maintain this for at least two days, maybe even three (you know what Fridays can be like). Should I just give up hope?

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Doctor Who

• Former producer Philip Hinchcliffe compares old Who with nu-Who

Film

• Not a joke after all: Corden and Horne to star in Lesbian Vampire Killers
• Nia Vardalos and John Corbett reteam for I Hate Valentine's Day
• Tommy Lee Jones to write, direct, produce and star in Hemingway's Islands in the Stream
• 15 minutes of behind the scenes footage from Indiana Jones
• Jonah Hill to star in 21 Jump Street adaptation?
• New Hulk trailer
• Leonardo DiCaprio to play Ian Fleming?
• Daniel Day Lewis to do musical based on 8½

Art

• Bacon's “Triptych, 1976” sets record for post-war art sale

British TV

• Kelly Brook to replace Jennifer Ellison on Dirty Dancing: The Time of Your Life
• Gordon Brown to do PM Apprentice show?
• Johnny Vegas to star in BBC3 record label comedy

US TV

• Allison Mack staying on Smallville
• TNT orders series from George Clooney, Joel Surnow et al
• Kelsey Grammer lobbying CBS execs to rescue Back To You
• Heroes webisodes to start mid-July
• Scrubs boss airs some grievances

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Is it just me or are the tasks starting to seem a bit daft on The Apprentice? Part of me is longing for something, I don't know, a bit more properly business-like. “Oh, look, they have five minutes to prepare for something they're all woefully underqualified to do. That's a good test of whether they'd be able to head up a major division of a global business company.”

Obviously, this is not a new criticism. But I'm looking for a little variety, I think. Something new, rather than the same old, same old. How about you?

PS Any Mac users think the teams would have done better if they'd had MacBooks and iPhoto instead of HP Windows rejects?
PPS Why do all the news outlets insist of putting the names of the fired apprentices on their front pages the very next day? Either you watched it, in which case you know who was fired, or you didn't – in which case you either don't care or you're now very hacked off. Like me.

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Doctor Who

• Eve Myles to host boxing on Radio Wales
• Catherine Tate and David Tennant to speak at Times Cheltenham Literary Festival

Film

• Ronald D Moore to write three sci-fi movies for United Artists
• Spielberg and Lucas talk!
• Brett Ratner to remake The Incredible Shrinking Man
• Emma Watson to star in Napoleon and Betsy
• Val Kilmer, 50 Cent, Sharon Stone, Dylan McDermott and Brian Presley to star in Streets of Blood
• MySpace and Hammer launch their first production

Commercials

• Halifax's Howard faces the axe

Comics

• Heroes' Milo Ventimiglia to star in comic book

British TV

• The Apprentice ratings increasing [free registration required]
• Switch to digital could have been greener
• Sky One to make two high-def adaptations of Martina Cole books
• ITV3's first original drama to be adaptation of Ladies of Letters
• ITV4 commissions documentaries featuring Andy McNab, Vinnie Jones and Philip Glenister
• Five Life (aka Fiver from April 28) to pick up Bebo's Sofia's Diary

French TV

• TF1 suing YouTube

US TV

• The Black Panther coming to BET
• NBC might want to come back to iTunes
• Harry Lennix and Angel's Amy Acker join Joss Whedon's Dollhouse
• David James Elliott to appear in disaster mini-series
• New Amsterdam looking dead
• ABC greenlights another sitcom pilot from Victor Fresco

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Doctor Who

• Rusty's not happy with his new slot
• David Tennant pictures from tonight's Friday Night Project

Film

• Dolph Lundgren to star in “Die Hard at a rock concert”
• Malice in Sunderland now to be filmed on Wearside
• Will Arnett to join Kristen Bell in When in Rome
• Kevin Kline has his first French-speaking role
• C Thomas Howell to star as George W Bush-alike in Commander and Chief
• Disney working on live-action remake of The Lone Ranger

Radio

• New season of comedy for Radio 4 on Mondays

British TV

• Friends writer creates sci-fi sitcom for BBC3
• Ashes to Ashes gets a second series
• The Apprentice gets its highest rated opening episode
• Two more series of My Family ordered
• Discovery to get a third Sky entertainment channel slot
• 87% of homes now have digital TV
• Armstrong and Miller form their own production company

US TV

• CSI: Miami writer Sunil Nayor gets two-year deal with CBS
• Samaire Armstrong no longer a regular on Dirty Sexy Money
• Sarah Wayne Callies to return to Prison Break as a regular. Hang on...
• Jason Bateman to direct the pilot for The Inn
• Lots of pilot casting, including Sara Rue in Spaced

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In the UK: Wednesdays, 9pm, BBC1

Sir Alan's back. Hasn't he learnt his lesson yet? Honestly.

You take a group of salespeople, who, let's face it, have an above average chance of being the scum of the earth and ask them to apply to be on a reality TV show. Since the good ones will all be earning very nice salaries at very nice companies, only the ones not doing so well (and who will therefore lie on their CV) and the most arrogant, preening twannocks with pebbles for brains will apply.

They get whittled down by the production team into the best group of 'personalities' possible, the ones guaranteed to be obnoxious, evil, sociopathic, incompetent idiots, usually with the kind of accents that can start class war in 70% of London boroughs as soon as they open their mouths. 

And then Sir Alan has to work out which of these creatures from the black sales lagoon he wants to employ by the end of the series.

I don't envy him.

Continue reading "Review: The Apprentice 4x1"

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Doctor Who

• Who's that? Why it's a very young David Tennant in Dramarama
• Phil Collinson to head up drama in Manchester

Film

• Indy to steal the Ark again?
• Rob Lowe to star with Ricky Gervais and Jennifer Garner in This Side of the Truth
• Stallone lined up for more sequels to Rocky and Rambo
• Anna Friel to star opposite Will Ferrell in Land of the Lost
• Joe Johnston to direct The Wolfman
• Trailer for Prince Caspian
• New Iron Man trailer
• Arrested Development movie talks confirmed

Australian TV

• Stephen Fry to appear in Neighbours?

British TV

• Adrian Chiles won't be hosting The Apprentice - You're Fired!
• Primeval won't have guest stars
• Top Gear to film in Japan

US TV

• Jay Leno or Jerry Seinfeld to host US version of Top Gear?
• Lena Headey tired of being compared to Linda Hamilton
• Behind the scenes of The Wire
• Cast lined up for The Man of Your Dreams comedy pilot
• After my appeal to the relevant authorities, NBC is likely to pick up Canada's The Listener, while other networks are looking at The Border and Sophie (why?)
• Breakthrough in writers' guild talks

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Read other posts about: Primeval, The Apprentice, The Wire, Top Gear

Doctor Who

• Writers' Guild gives award to series three writers. Yes, even Chris Chibnall and Helen Raynor
• Sweet FA to appear on The Omid Djalili Show

Film

• Ben Cross to play Spock's dad in Star Trek XI
• Sarah Michelle Prinze 'too scared' for Buffy movie
• High quality trailer for Cloverfield now available
• Sienna Miller cast in GI Joe
• The X Files 2 to include Millennium crossover?
• Angels and Demons, Bruno, JLA postponed by strike

British TV

• Christian group wants to sue the Beeb over Jerry Springer
• BBC HD channel approved
• Pipes is up for porn award

US TV

• Journeyman on verge of being cancelled?
• Red Hot Chili Peppers suing Showtime over use of the word Californication
• Warner Bros trying to launch global on-demand networks
• 'Celebrity' contestants for The Apprentice named
• New promo for BSG: Razor
• US version of Little Britain delayed by strike

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Read other posts about: Battlestar Galactica, Star Trek, The Apprentice

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